A viral Reddit conversation has unearthed the male stereotypes that anger men.
The thread was started by a user with the handle MrStealYourMan, believed to be based in the US. He asked male users of the platform to comment about a myth about men that they found to be 100 per cent untrue and anger-inducing.
The question obviously struck a nerve with many, as the post garnered over 19,000 comments in response.
Of the responses, many were focused on the issues of body image, self esteem and confidence.
One man pointed out that he found it infuriating that men are seen to be ‘somehow completely incapable of hating their bodies.’
‘Whatever they look like, they must be completely happy with themselves. Unrealistic bodily expectations aren’t limited to women,’ the user pointed out.
His post resonated with hundreds of Redditors.
‘I used to avoid looking in the mirror and would avoid pictures because I hated how I looked so much,’ one man said.
‘I’m 5’2″, 25 years old. I’m slowly coming to terms with it, but there’s still days where it feels bad,’ said another.
Apart from complaints about their height, which many men had, several users chimed in with stories of weight issues, body dysmorphia, skin problems and hair woes.
‘I had terrible acne and was never able to use cover up for photos because I worried I’d be made fun of for using makeup. Would have been nice to hide my acne in a school picture,’ one male said.
Many people offered those who revealed they struggled with self esteem positive and uplifting replies.
Others said that they found it irritating when people thought that men ‘don’t need compliments’.
‘I hate it when I do it [offer compliments] to my male friends and some other acquaintance will overhear and tease me for it. But when I do it to a female friend, nobody gives s**t. I believe that guys deserve to be complimented sincerely once in a while, like everybody else,’ a user pointed out.
Several people raised the issue of domestic abuse and violence, and how it was wrong that men can’t be seen to be victims.
‘That men cant be victims of abuse or domestic violence from women. Yeah, we can, and statistically, if we report it, there’s a solid chance that we’ll be the ones going to jail for it, even if all we did was take it and not fight back. Screw that,’ a man posted.
There were lots of issues raised on the subject of the dynamic between men and women, and how some people couldn’t take a male/female friendship without insinuating more was going on between a pair.
Someone said he was bothered by the ‘myth’ that ‘men only talk to women because they want something from them’.
‘This happened to me a lot in middle school and the beginning of high school because I had a lot of female friends. I’m not girl crazy, it’s just not hard for me to make friends with both guys and girls,’ he said.
A user with the handle sbroll said that he gets mad when people assume that he didn’t ‘give a s**t about his wedding day’.
‘I cannot believe the amount of people (mostly ladies) who just straight up assumed, ‘all you have to remember is where to be and to say I do right? haw haw haw’. F**kin annoying. I had ideas of how I wanted it to look and how I wanted it to go as well. But my goodness, not a single person thought I gave a s**t even though I constantly was trying to give my take on stuff. It was always met with, ‘oh you don’t need to worry about that’ or ‘oh the ladies will figure that out’ like, this is infuriating,’ he said.
One of the most common points raised was the fact that men tend to be dissed when they are seen to be minding children.
‘I hate when I out with my kids people jokingly say ‘Are you on Daddy duty?’. I’ve never heard someone ask a mom if she’s on Mommy Duty. It’s assumed that men don’t take their kids places and it really annoys me because I work full time but I also get my kids ready in the morning, cook them breakfast, prepare their lunches, eat lunch with them at school once per week, bring them to most Dr. and dentist appointments,’ a user said.
In the same vein, one of the most interacted with comments on the page – with 700 responses – was a post from a man who took ire with the way men are depicted on commercials.
‘How we can’t do laundry, cook, raise kids, or anything without our wives coming to show us how. Look, a**holes, I’m single and I do all my own cleaning, laundry, dishes, etc. I have never stared at a mop like it was a plasma death ray, nor have I ever had to rush out to buy dinner because I burned mine (well, a few times when drunk, but that’s not the same thing). I also am capable of taking care of a baby without having to call a woman to give me directions. (I don’t have kids, but I have younger cousins and what not. I can change a diaper and bottle feed just fine),’ he said.
A female user with the handle opalescent_moon praised him for raising this point.
‘Thank you! I’m a girl with a whole bunch of younger brothers. My mom insisted that she wanted all of her sons to know how to cook, clean, do laundry, mend clothes, etc. And they do! These are important life skills, no matter your gender. Just like women should master certain “masculine” skills, like basic home maintenance and car repairs.’
Many people raised points such as that they wished women would stop believing that they can control when they get an erection. One man pointed out that he finds it infuriating when women assume that all men gossip about their sex lives with their buddies.
And on the topic of prevalent, random stereotypes, one man said, ‘I f**king love Bath and Body Works. I love mojitos, margs, and other fruity cocktails. I will always buy pads/tampons when asked. I cry sometimes. I can point out/notice a good-looking guy (as a straight guy).’
‘This is the one that gets me the most – sometimes I feel like I can’t compliment a new haircut or whatever. I hate the ‘no homo’ thing – a compliment isn’t gay unless you make it gay,’ he added.